Online Dating and the Missing Sox

Three more "winks" for my profile. I am now showing 12 profile views, 6 winks, and 2 e-mails. So, that is at least a 50% contact ratio. As my friend Borat might say, "Success! You are #4 prostitute in San Diego!" One is a 26-year old chick from Santa Clara (?), one is a local 33-year old MILF, and the other is a 29-year old girl who, from her profile and photo, appears to be a cute girl that I would actually go out with. Except we all know that people who participate in online dating are weirdos and losers.

Personally, I thought my profile was too lengthy, but it apparently is getting the job done. What is it about the profile that is working? Possibly these elements:

1. My profile states that I, like the guys down at the Gas 'n Sip, am single by choice. I think a reference to "Say Anything" is probably pretty money.

2. My profile states that I can fix things around the house and kill insects, but can also be talked into going to see a chick flick without too much whining on my part. I don't go to many movies, but I am pretty much entertained by anything, even if I am being entertained by the crappiness of the film. I went and saw Legally Blonde 2 with a chick, then we bagged on the movie the rest of the night until we went back to her place. No skin off my nose. Plus there was some inappropriate touching in the theater. I really should apologize for that - he was a 9-year old. My bad, it was dark.

3. My profile states that I would rather lay around in bed on a Sunday morning with a chick than get up and watch football. This is generally true, even though the Patriots play on Sunday mornings. I don't have DirecTV and can't get the NFL package, and the Pats are rarely on the network stations here in San Diego. Plus, I have Tivo if they are on.

Are these things true? Pretty much. As far as you (or they) know.

Back to #3, even when the Pats are on (or any team that I like), I don't feel that compelled to watch them if there aren't other people around. I would probably rather watch, say, UC Davis football with LRD, who will be really into the game, than watch a Cal game by myself. For me, football and sports in general are more about sharing the experience with others who are into it. I took my brother to Pittsburgh to see the Pats and Steelers play, in the third game of the season after the Pats beat the Eagles in the Super Bowl. I liked being at the game, but the best part was seeing how excited my brother was to be there, and to walk around the city wearing his authentic game jersey. (The second best part was having relations after the Pats won, with a girl wearing a Hines Ward jersey, while I was wearing a Tom Brady jersey.)

I also think being a Cal and a Red Sox fan during the dark times has conditioned me not to love my teams too much. I think it was in the movie "Bronx Tale" where the Sonny character is telling the C character not to care about the Yankees, because none of the Yankees players give a crap about C. I think that's true. Put another way, as noted in the chick flick "Fever Pitch" (see #2 above), the Red Sox have never loved me back. Cal hasn't really loved me back either, I guess, unless you count letters asking me to donate to the school, or Sean Lampley threatening to kick my ass, as love (to be fair to Sean, I was two rows behind him at a football game, chanting "N.I.T.! N.I.T.!" immediately before said threatened ass-kicking).

So, I am a fan but not a huge, crazy fan. When the Sox won the World Series in 2004, a lot of people called to congratulate me. I wasn't all that excited about it. It was nice, but it is getting harder and harder to like the Red Sox. They are now pretty much the Yankees. I could root for them when there was a perceived difference between the teams, but they are basically the same now. So, I can root for them to beat the Yankees, but feel bad about rooting for them to beat other teams when they have such a financial advantage. I didn't love the JD Drew signing, not because he is a bad player, but because they bought him. Would much rather see homegrown talent out on the field. Matsuzaka is intriguing, but purchased. Papelbon was drafted. Would have liked to see him in the rotation this year. So, I can like Ortiz (initally signed for little money, as a player the Twins gave up on), Papelbon, Pedroia, Youkilis (though I don't), Crisp (not a top money guy, and we got him pretty young, but he is turning out to be a bust), Varitek (don't really like him either, but thanks, Seattle, for him and Derek Lowe. How's Heathchliff Slocumb working out for ya?). But, overall, a lot of hired guns on that team. It's not really a team. It's players.